My Story
Everything we want, is on the other side of fear.
At the age of 30, I was a high achiever in Tech Sales for 15 years. I had everything I wanted. I was healthy, financially secure, confident and in a loving marriage.
I was rushing everywhere, living the highs and lows of a Sales career, thriving at work not thinking anything was wrong. I was being successful from a place of auto-pilot. .
For me success was work related, it was financial freedom. I was shocked to discover it wasn't enough to make me happy. At the time, the only thing I could think of being to blame for having everything I wanted but not feeling happy, was my relationship. Isn't it always easier to blame someone else?!
Transformation is messy in the middle.
I thought I had found the answer the second time around. But no. I exhausted myself with trying to hit target consistently, ignored chronic stress signs, focused on pleasing everyone, living to my high expectations and trying to be perfect at work and at home.
After being a step-mum, a burnout, health scares, and trauma which led to a second divorce, I hit rock bottom.
I had been living a life I thought I "should" want based on beliefs created in my childhood but these didn't make me happy. This is because I had never been honest with what I really wanted for myself. I didn’t know who I was when I wasn’t pleasing others. This led to a lot of resistance and trauma in body, my relationships and my life. I became weak, a former shadow of myself, trapped in an unhealthy relationship on a path to self-destruction.
The life I had created wasn’t aligned with the deeper essence of myself. When I found out that our experiences are mostly driven from unconscious programing which lead to repetitions in our lives, I decided that I didn’t want to repeat any of my story again, so I committed to heal myself, which took me to Bali and Thailand. I learnt about presence, breathing and trauma recovery processes. I learnt to reset new beliefs and habits needed to create the new life I actually wanted for myself which are healing for my mind, heart and body and not destructive.
We don’t know, what we don’t know.
Following a 5 year recovery period focusing on healing my body, balancing my emotions and self-discovery to understand what I was getting wrong. This is when I discovered that:
95% of our thoughts, feelings and actions are subconscious
I was shocked to discover that based on my subconscious inner wiring and life experience, the drama in my life was always going to playout due to earlier life trauma. This was a huge revelation.
When we become self-aware, we see more of our subconscious behaviours, so we become more informed to make better choices. Life then becomes a series of conscious choices. Instead of being controlled by our auto-pilot subconscious programing from early life experiences, we can choose to overcome and change this programing to respond more consciously and make choices which serve us better to create a life we "choose" for ourselves.
Self-Knowledge is Self-Empowerment
I had to go from feeling numb, being cut off from my emotions, being a machine but performing very well; to a burnout, trauma, losing my home, feeling overwhelmed by emotions and a long recovery process to learn how to reconnect to my feelings, my body and my soul to manage my well-being and build healthy relationships.
I believe prevention is better than cure. We should have access to self-knowledge more easily to learn to better handle prevent difficult times.
The journey of learning to align with our true self is how we can truly perform from well-being.
Today I know how to feel centered by consciously accessing a state of calm when I need to make better conscious choices and over ride unhelpful unconscious patterns to lead a better quality of life. This daily work is never ending. It is the inner work.
The feeling of being aligned while temporary, is magic. Everything feels lighter, things comes easy, self-doubt disappears and things just flow. For me the game of life is learning to access and stay in this state more and for longer every time while remaining connected to myself and others.
I understand that I am not a victim of my upbringing which programed my sub-conscious mind. It is not my fault. Today, I choose that it is my responsibility to overcome the programing and create a new one to design my own reality and my own happiness. Today I have my power back.
Feel Better. Live Better. Work Better.
The real gift of this story for me is that I can now be of service to others who wish to step into their power because I have come back from rock bottom and transformed my personal and my professional life multiple times. I understand this transformation process. I coach and teach it to those who want to make lasting changes in their lives both at work and at home.
Knowing that 95% of our thoughts, feelings and emotions are subconscious, I have now made it my business to help people better understand their conscious and subconscious mind because the quality of our mind determines the quality of our life, and yes we can change it!
After, building my confidence back and after years of healing, professional training and coaching certifications, I now support the path for others with personal and professional development through transformational coaching. I have created services to make the self-knowledge I wish I had earlier in my career more accessible to all so they can get unstuck, reset, recover and rise.
Thank you for your attention and interest. Feel free to reach out if you would like a 15mins talk to share the issues which you are looking to overcome, and I’ll be able to confirm how I can help you.
Training & Coaching Excellence
The training and coaching industry isn’t well understood by many and it can be difficult to discern people’s competencies.
I chose to adhere to the International Coaching Federation, an organisation which certifies Professional Coaches to agree to work by respecting a code of ethics and set professional standards to assure the quality of coaching services is consistent , maintained and regularly evaluated against the ICF industry excellence expectations. To maintain such certification, supervision, mentoring, continuous learning education and the logging of hours are needed to be submitted on a regular basis for assessment.
I work with the Process Communication Model as the basis for my psychology expertise. I also work with NLP techniques which underpins a lot of my work.
The International Coaching Federation
The ICF is the global hub for all things coaching. They are a membership organisation to certify the highest quality of trained professional coaches.
Certified Professional Coaching
The Process Communication Model®
PCM is applied psychology used to empower Leadership teams with personality profiling for stress management and adaptive communication. I leverage it to help you discover what you don't know about yourself which may be getting in the way of the change you want to make by building self-awareness of personality types, psychological needs and predictable stress responses.
Personality Profiling & Adaptive Communication
The Association for Integrative Psychology
The purpose of the Association for Integrative Psychology, Inc. is to promote awareness and acceptance of complementary, alternative, and integrative approaches to human behaviour as viable ways to facilitate change.
Neuro-linguistic programming (NLP)
My qualifications
15 years successful International Tech Sales
Ex LinkedIn, Ex Equinix, Ex Rackspace
International Coaching Federation ACC Certification 500hrs+ ICF PCC Application In progress.
NLP Practitioner since 2014
Process Communication Model Leadership Trainer & Coach - Personality Profiling
Gestalt Psychology informed - École Parisienne de Gestalt
BSc (Hons) Sports and Exercise Science from Loughborough University
200 hrs Yoga Teacher Training – Breathwork & Meditation
Bi-Lingual in French and English
My life experiences and my own recovery!
“Transformation comes from becoming comfortable with the uncomfortable.”
— Lauren Cartigny